I agree with you but there is always that one person that will remind you of the guilt and shame. It sometimes doesn't matter if you have forgiven yourself or not, they will always be there to push it in your face no matter how trivial the situation.
Actively trying to do this with a terrible memory that has begun plaguing me. From a time I was incapacitated practically but still my behavior was revealing of edges of inhumanity.
Nicely put. Reminds me of a saying in a book called Secrets of Emotional Healing by J. Donald Walters: "The secret of overcoming feelings of guilt is to relinquish the past; for whatever has been done can’t be undone. Resolve, instead, to do better from today onward–and ever better, until that 'better' becomes the very best that is in you. View your mistakes as prods, merely, to ultimate victory."
I totally agree! Feelings of shame and guilt are evidence of awareness, a primary attribute of any being guided by moral principles and intellectual honesty that distinguishes them from the sociopaths who haunt our societies and allow the perpetration and perpetuation of the horrors we are witnessing. Gratitude then, should only be the prelude to a process of repairing self-esteem and its engagement in actions intended to combat the thoughts, feelings and actions that have induced shame and guilt. This logical chain is evidence of a healthy and honest cognitive process. This is unfortunately far from being the case for the gregarious and indifferent masses who run around in our societies, absolutely not preoccupied by any concern for guilt, repentance or redemption…
Yes, thank you Alex! I think the thing that shifts us from guilt to gratitude is grace, being gentle with ourselves and open to forgiveness.
“The movement of grace toward gratitude brings us from the package of self-obsessed madness to a spiritual awakening. Gratitude is peace.” - Anne Lamott
I’ve been up since 3 am and I couldn’t figure out why. Then I remembered an incident that I’ve hidden that causes me a lot of shame and guilt. After hours unpacking it I opened substack to see your beautiful post. Thank you.
All so true. Thanks !
I agree with you but there is always that one person that will remind you of the guilt and shame. It sometimes doesn't matter if you have forgiven yourself or not, they will always be there to push it in your face no matter how trivial the situation.
It’ll be between them and God in the end, it’s not your fault.
Actively trying to do this with a terrible memory that has begun plaguing me. From a time I was incapacitated practically but still my behavior was revealing of edges of inhumanity.
Can be very hard, no doubt about it.
Nicely put. Reminds me of a saying in a book called Secrets of Emotional Healing by J. Donald Walters: "The secret of overcoming feelings of guilt is to relinquish the past; for whatever has been done can’t be undone. Resolve, instead, to do better from today onward–and ever better, until that 'better' becomes the very best that is in you. View your mistakes as prods, merely, to ultimate victory."
I totally agree! Feelings of shame and guilt are evidence of awareness, a primary attribute of any being guided by moral principles and intellectual honesty that distinguishes them from the sociopaths who haunt our societies and allow the perpetration and perpetuation of the horrors we are witnessing. Gratitude then, should only be the prelude to a process of repairing self-esteem and its engagement in actions intended to combat the thoughts, feelings and actions that have induced shame and guilt. This logical chain is evidence of a healthy and honest cognitive process. This is unfortunately far from being the case for the gregarious and indifferent masses who run around in our societies, absolutely not preoccupied by any concern for guilt, repentance or redemption…
Yes, thank you Alex! I think the thing that shifts us from guilt to gratitude is grace, being gentle with ourselves and open to forgiveness.
“The movement of grace toward gratitude brings us from the package of self-obsessed madness to a spiritual awakening. Gratitude is peace.” - Anne Lamott
I’ve been up since 3 am and I couldn’t figure out why. Then I remembered an incident that I’ve hidden that causes me a lot of shame and guilt. After hours unpacking it I opened substack to see your beautiful post. Thank you.
Good timing!