She was cold.
But I couldn't help her.
The ocean's waves roared while the darkness sunk in. I held her in my arms, leaning against the palm tree … begging God from the deepest part of my heart, God, please, help us.
*Earlier that Day*
I inhaled the salty air, feeling a sense of pride and belonging. It was too long since I last took a boat trip. The seagulls overhead squawked while the sun burned my skin. I watched Rachel fish in her bag for her sunscreen, grumbling to herself how she was afraid of getting sunburned.
“Did I forget the sunscreen, Tyler?” She whipped her head in my direction, looking panicked. I admired the way the wind caught her dark hair and how the sun caused her skin to glow.
I had no idea why she wanted sunscreen.
“I don't know, honey, last I saw it was on the kitchen counter,” I answered.
“Dang it …” Rachel threw her bag under the seat compartment. “I'll be burned to a crisp by the time we get back.” She sat down, using her flowy sundress to cover herself completely.
I laughed a little, not at all understanding her paranoia. We were married for two years, together for four, and I still couldn't figure out why she fussed over half of the things she did.
It was cute.
“Oh-kay, Captain Tyler,” she heaved a sigh. “You dragged me out here, so where are you taking me?”
“It’s a surprise.” I grinned.
“I hate surprises.” She frowned.
“I know.”
“Fine.” Rachel shook her head. “Just nothing too adventurous, alright? You know how much I'm a–”
“Bookworm?” Tyler filled in.
“I was going to say indoors person but I guess bookworm works.” Rachel held up the book she had brought. “All the adventures I need are written in these fine pages.”
“No, I'm all the adventure you'll need,” I said with a smirk. Rachel blushed, before burying her face in her book, and I proceeded to drive the boat out of the channel.
We were young, still in our early twenties. I loved going on adventures, and she liked reading about them. On a regular basis, I've teased her about how we met. That fine, salty day when she was reading and walking in the marina…
And walked right off a dock.
I happily rescued her, of course, and we've been together since then. Except, Rachel’s always been more of a closed book. Everyday, I do my best to flip to the next page. But sometimes, it gets difficult when she doesn’t let me. Countless times, I’ve tried to bring her into relaxing, scenic moments—like these—but I’d find her in a book.
“I always do it,” she told me, once.
“But taking a walk is about embracing the scenery around you,” I tried explaining.
“I know, but …” Rachel hugged her book. “When I relax, I'm forced to think. But when I read, I don't need to think.”
I never understood what Rachel meant by that statement, not until later on in our relationship. She talked of nightmares, and fears, that all linked to her past. Reading was her way of escape, but never the answer.
We both knew that.
Even I found myself out on my boat, searching for something to calm the storms in my life. Combined, Rachel and I felt like we were trapped in a hurricane of chaos. And yet, somehow our search for internal peace turned into the answer for our weary souls. We found the giver of everlasting peace, Jesus, and it's been a journey of ours since then.
I thought of this, as I watched Rachel set her book down. Her eyes were fixated on the waves and the blue sky. She seemed to study each white cap, ripple, bird, or cloud–the perfect look of peace and contentment. I sniffled, recalling a time when Rachel wasn't able to ever relax.
“What?” She looked at him, smiling.
“Just admiring,” I answered.
Rachel rose to her feet and came to stand by my side. She gave me a peck on the cheek and whispered, “God is good.” Rachel slipped her arm through mine and we watched the movement of the waves together.
For the next hour, we talked, laughed, saw dolphins and manatees, and then relaxed in the sounds of the ocean. I watched Rachel fall asleep, the hot sun and sea air doing her good. Then, I checked the navigation. I was taking her out to an island about 50 miles away from the coast. It was a popular place to go, but it took some time to get there. Relaxing, I focused on the waves and clouds … admiring God's unending beauty.
Until I saw it. The dark, settling cloud, pushing its way toward us from behind. The weather report was good! I thought, flipping on the radio I kept the volume low and called the coast guard.
“The storm snuck up on everybody,” the man explained. “You better turn back while you can.”
“I'm worried I'll just drive into it.” I glanced at Rachel, hoping I wouldn't wake her.
“You might have to go around it. Give me your coordinates and I'll make sure to keep an eye on things.”
I obeyed and maneuvered the boat back toward the coast. Going around the storm would make it take longer, but it was better than driving through it.
“Tyler?” Rachel blinked her sleepy eyes. “Did you turn around?”
“Yeah, I had to. But it's just because of a storm, the Coast Guard told me where to go to avoid it.”
Rachel's eyes widened. Without a word, she quickly opened the seat compartments and pulled out the life vests. I watched the cloud that kept getting bigger, then sped up the boat. We had to get back.
“How far are we from the coast?” She took the wheel while I clipped on the vest.
“Thirty miles.”
“Ty …” she gasped.
“We'll be fine,” I promised.
But we were far from being fine.
The jet-black clouds overcame us in minutes, causing the choppy waves to slow the boat down. I felt Rachel's right grip on my arm, as I navigated up and down the increasingly large waves. Then, the rain came.
Crash, boom!
Lightning nearly blinded us, while the thunder vibrated my whole body.
“Tyler!” Rachel screamed. She stood at my side, too afraid to leave me.
“Hang on!” I wiped my face, trying to keep my focus on the waves.
But it was too dark, too fast. Left and right, the waves smacked the small boat, sending water directly at us. The icy touch of the rain and ocean made Rachel's hands shiver and my teeth chatter. The lightning lit up the sky, reveling for a brief second, the largest wave I had ever seen.
“Look out!” I wrapped one arm around Rachel, while the other gripped the wheel.
Smack!
The weight of the wave crashing on us felt like a sucker punch from the ocean itself. We both stumbled off our feet and toppled to the other side of the boat. Rachel coughed and cried, while I held onto her hand and quickly made it back for the wheel.
“Tyler!” Rachel shouted, pointing.
I looked up for a split second, gulping in fear, as a second huge wave formed from the side of the boat. I felt a shift below our feet, as the boat slowly rose with the water. I pulled Rachel into the tightest hug then–
Swoosh!
The whole boat flipped over. Our bodies dropped into the angry water with a hard hit. Still holding onto Rachel, I clawed our way to the surface until the life vests lifted us back up.
“Rachel! Rachel?”
“I'm okay!” She sputtered, her hands clung to arm. I held onto her, watching the boat get tossed by the waves.
“Ty, Ty, Ty!”
We were under, then up. I breathed and choked, spun, and flipped. The gravity of the water’s grip nearly knocked me out, its determination to take me under was fierce. But I wasn't going to let Rachel go.
Then, the boat came at us. The giant wave raised it above our heads, then threw the boat down like an angry monster. I was under again, wrestling the invisible beast that clawed to separate me from my wife. I could hear her screaming, even underwater. But something huge and heavy smacked the back of my head. I lurched and lost my hold on Rachel.
It was the boat.
The current of the waves pulled me under it, causing my heart and lungs to panic. Lord, save us! I kicked and kicked, ignoring the repeated times the boat hit my body. Until finally, I made one final kick pushed against the boat, breaking the surface.
“Rachel!” I shouted, my lungs burning. “Rachel!” I swam away from the boat, worried to get sucked under again. “Rachel!”
Lightning flashed, allowing me to see the formations of the water. I scanned for the life vest, a hand, or anything that told me it was Rachel.
“Tyler …” I faint whisper reached my ears. I turned to my left and swam with all my strength.
The waves pushed me forward and I saw Rachel in the distance, floating on her back. “I'm coming! I'm coming.” I swam harder, despite my body aching. The distance between the boat and larger waves increased. Until finally, she was there. “Rachel!” I grabbed Rachel by her waist and rested her head against my shoulder. “Honey, talk to me.” I couldn't see her face in the dark, but knew she wasn't moving. “Rachel!” I tapped her cheek and she stirred.
“Tyler.” Rachel coughed, then locked her arm with mine. But I could feel it, she was too weak to move.
It was up to me to get us out of this.
“Just stay with me,” I told her. “We'll be fine, I promise.”
But it never seemed to end … the tossing, jerking, and lightning. I struggled to keep my eyes open, the salt water practically blinding me. I felt Rachel's grip loosen at some point, so I had to hold tighter. The current led us forever, I kept kicking and treading with it, knowing I had no other choice. The movement kept my bones from shivering, but gosh … I was cold. My panting turned into wheezing and my hold on Rachel felt like we were frozen to each other.
I grew weary, each blink being slower than the last. Then, I closed my eyes for just one second to pray, “Lord, please, save us.”
Roar…wooosh!
Water went in and out of my lungs, while the whole world spun. My body landed with a hard thump and Rachel half crashed on top of me. I blinked, coughed, and felt the cold waves rush over us.
“Land!” I spoke weakly, but adrenaline kicked in.
I felt the sandy earth below me and quickly flipped over on my stomach. I barely could move when dragged myself and Rachel further into land. I stopped at the closest palm tree and dropped to my knees.
“Hon … Rachel …” I rolled her onto her back. The setting sun was hidden behind the clouds, but its light still shining. My heart sunk at the sight of Rachel, her lips purple and the dark circles under her eyes. I didn't move for a second, terror gripping my body before I had a chance to make a full evaluation.
“Ty …” Rachel's lips moved.
“Rachel,” I breathed, scooping her up and holding her close. She coughed, then vomited, then coughed more. I rocked Rachel like a little girl, not knowing what else to do. The reality of what could have been felt too close. I just wanted to hold her.
“Cold.” Rachel's weak hand rested on my face. She was shaking. Horribly. It was then that I realized I was too.
I held her hand and pressed it against my lips. “I know, honey, me too.”
My teeth chattered, as I scanned the beach. I had no idea where we were. It was an island, but how far off were we from civilization? I prayed the coast guard would come searching for us. And soon.
I kept my eyes fixed on the ocean, the last remnants of the sun stretching across the water. I blinked slowly, listening to the ocean roar. Stay awake, I reminded myself. Watch for rescue boats.
“Tyler?” Rachel was curled up, looking cold and scared. She held my hand tight.
“Hmm?”
“Why do …” She paused. “Why do the storms follow us?”
I looked down, the last ray of the sun practically beaming on her tired face. Rachel's eyes were fixed on me, searching for the truth. I knew what Rachel was talking about, but wasn't sure how to answer. I swallowed the lump in my tender throat and caressed her cheek.
“Storms follow everybody,” I reminded her. “They followed Jesus.”
“Really?” Her big eyes grew.
“Yeah, you remember.” We both shivered by a strong breeze that came in. “Jesus told the storm to stop and it stopped.” I wanted to explain it better, but I felt a fog hang over my brain. “And Jesus walked the waves when it was storming.”
“He did.” A soft smile formed on Rachel's face. The sight of it warmed my heart.
“He is our peace in the storm,” I assured her, blinking myself asleep. “Our peace.”
I found her the next morning, just sitting at the edge of the beach, watching the tide come in. Her frizzy hair blew in the wind and her toes curled in the sand. Rachel's gaze was fixed on the water, the sun shining on her. We were stranded on an island and nearly drowned overnight. I didn't know what to tell her, but I knew I had to say something. Pulling myself up on my feet, I came and sat beside her. She smiled softly at me and I noticed the color in her face returned. No more purple.
“Are you okay?” My throat was still sore from swallowing so much salt water.
“I am.” She leaned her head against my shoulder. “Are you?”
“Yeah.” I wrapped my arm around her, guilt sinking into my gut. “I'm sorry about this.”
“It's not your fault,” Rachel was quick to say. “Storms come and go.” She inhaled. “But … I realized … we are a miracle.”
“We are.” I squeezed her. “It's a miracle we survived.”
Rachel nodded, a warm smile spreading on her face. “It's a miracle we're together.” She lifted her head and stared into my eyes. “We've always been in a storm, Tyler, but when we met...” Tears filled her eyes. “Jesus called us out to walk on the waves. He wasn't going to sit back and let us get tossed around in the boat. He's always called us out and into His peace.”
I kissed her forehead, my own tears forming. “So nearly drowning wasn't so bad for you?” I smiled.
She laughed. Her sweet, delicate laugh. “No, that was bad. Awful. I thought we were gonna die.” She hugged me. “But we fought for life. We fought for peace. And Jesus was there to back us up.”
“A strand of three is not easily broken,” I quoted. “Through thick and thin, we're in this together.”
Rachel's fingers grasped into mine. “For always and forever.”
We stayed there, in the sand. The weariness we endured didn’t let us do anything else, but wait. Rachel and I were survivors, legitimately and figuratively. Except, we never tried just surviving. No, we were focused on reaching for the next best thing. Growing stronger in every storm, to move forward—closer to God—and further away from what was left behind. I loved her for her diligence. I loved her for her growth. I loved her for how she could shake off every storm and press into the next one. And I knew that God did too.
It was only a few hours until a coast guard helicopter flew overhead. With our hope filled hearts we went home alive and well, thanking God for being our miracle.
Foundation Scriptures:
A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.
Ecclesiastes 4:12 NLT
“Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”
“Come,” he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”
Matthew 14:28-30 NKJV
Personal thoughts:
I can’t express how much writing this story was a “storm” itself. I was so frustrated, trying to keep things interesting while sharing a message. But then, the Lord kept pointing me to how symbolic the overall story is.
The storm Tyler and Rachel survived from carries a type of personification, that illustrates the reality of the storms we face in life from our past or present. How many times have we all got tossed around by bad experiences? How many times have our boats “capsized” and we felt we would drown?
I liked describing the ocean as an invisible beast that tried “clawing” Tyler away from Rachel. I think it depicts the realness of how the battles we face in life try so hard to divide us from the people we love. But even in the midst of our darkest hours, Christ is there to carry us through.
I used to use writing and reading as a way of escape (yes, I’m actually guilty of reading & walking at the same time, haha. I do not recommend). But I have come to find peace in my life the more I reach for Jesus. In truth, He is calling each of us, saying, “Come.” His heart desires for us to get out of our boats of comfort zones and what we think is secure, for us to take a step on the waters—trusting Him and His everlasting security.
With Christ, we fight through every storm. And when we pursue Jesus, calling upon His name, He is always there to pull us out and into His arms of Peace. Life is ugly and difficult, but we have our miracle, our peace: the Victory of Jesus Christ. And that, my dear brothers and sisters, will forever keep us strong and teach us how to walk the stormy waves of life.
Thank you all for reading and God Bless!
Beautiful words, Merissa. Is all alright by you?
Waking up this morning I began to read and as always taken aback by the depth of your writing. It is inspirational every time. Thank you